Myrtle the Fertile Turtle

OK- if I was ever going to set a New Year's Resolution, it should be to update my blog at more than just once a month. Not that you've been missing anything to exciting since 1-01-11 rolled around. Unless you think snow and ice and shoveling the driveway is exciting, well then you missed that. 

But let's start fresh and I'm here to tell you about a special purchase I made recently. I spied this little gem on another blog I read everyday and I knew I had to have one for myself. 

Every year for Christmas, we get so many generous gifts, including the money that Grammie Lou gives to all her grandkids along with their annual pajamas (and without Grammie, I would never own a pair of nice matching pajamas, so I am grateful for this gift!). I always save Grammie's money for a practical purchase or something necessary, even though every year she tells all of us to use it for something fun. 

So, this year, I did. 

I bought myself this: 

It is a gold turtle necklace I bought on Etsy.com from lunaCielo Jewelry in California. Before you think, "Ok, that's weird. A turtle necklace?" let me explain why this little charm means so much to me. 

Along with the necklace came a little card that reads this: 
The turtle is a symbol of longevity and wisdom. Incredibly, sea turtles have existed on Earth longer than any other vertebrate animal - they were here when dinosaurs evolved and became extinct, and they survived the Ice Age.

The turtle naturally withdraws and goes within when in turmoil. It does not need to learn the importance of this focusing inward, it naturally knows.

The turtle's whole life is one of steadfastness, effort, and patience. It lives a slow and steady life of "non-doing." There is a saying, "Home is where the heart is" - the turtle is always at home within itself.

I really liked what it meant - wisdom, strength, patience and being at home within oneself. And Native Americans believed it was symbolic of female fertility, and I like that part, too. 

It's just a small little symbol to remind me on the days I wear it to be strong, stay patience, have faith and know when to stop and take care of myself. I think it says a lot about where I want to be right now. 





 

For Bailey

I remember the day you came to be with us

We went to the shelter to go and pick you up
Your brothers and sisters were sitting there, too
But out of all six, we knew it had to be you.


In your first car ride, we sat together in the back seat
With your paws on my lap, big eyes looking up at me
I told you I loved you and how your name would be Bailey
And how you would love your brand new family


You had stinky breath as a little girl
And your fur was like steel wool in tight little curls
Your teeth were razor sharp and hurt to the touch
But we always forgave you because we loved you so much


When you got a bit older, we took you to puppy school
We wanted you to be smart, and to follow our rules
But at play time with all the other dogs
You hid under a chair acting shy like you didn’t belong


Your best feature was your sweet face
The top of your head was a perfect kissing place
At the sound of name, your head would tilt to the side
You looked so adorable, like you were posing just right

As you grew up, you were always with Jenna and me

You protected your “girls” so very faithfully
Sleeping on my bedroom floor each night
You were often nearby and you kept us in sight

Remember the time when I was home all alone?
It was dark and I was so scared being on my own
So, I locked us up together in the bathroom to be safe
You never minded or wondered how long we would have to wait



And what about seventh grade when I was a complete wreck?
You sat by side and I hugged you and cried into your neck
You made me feel better because you just let me cry
I didn’t have to pretend and you never asked why


Years passed and I grew up and went out on my path
Still you always looked forward to when I would come back
Waiting for me at the door when I came in
For a pat on the head and a, “How have you been?”

When I went and adopted my two dogs of my own

To have that same love that you’d always shown

You knew that you had never been replaced

For in my heart you still have that special place

At the end of your life you kept fighting on

I knew you were hurting, but you always stayed strong

You still wagged your tail whenever Jenna or I came through the door

Even though sometimes it was hard for you to get up off the floor

Then was your final day and I got to kiss you goodbye

I told you I loved you and you told me it was time

I would miss you for always, love you forever

Forget about you, I could never

I know somewhere out there you’re waiting for us

To see your “girls” that you loved so very much

It will be the best reunion that there could ever be

Because you’ll be beautiful and once again healthy

We called you “Best Dog” because that’s what you were

There will be nobody like our favorite big girl

Thank you for giving us so many good memories

I’ll see you someday, so be looking for me.

Fa la la la la....

It's not even December yet, but Christmas has come early here at 4887 Kelly Ave.

Look, it's not that we hate Thanksgiving (like SOME people I know...eh, Jenna.), but in all honestly December will be here soon and the coming weeks are going to fly by. In fact, I didn't even get to changing the calendar to November on the fridge....it's gone that fast.

So, in case you don't get to stop by before Christmas (and I seriously won't hold it against you; it's just a busy time of year for everybody), here's what our place looks like all ho-ho-ho-ified.

We got our first real-live Christmas tree since 2007:

I switched the table runner for a snowflake one ...(pssst....check out the new roman shades I bought for the dining room windows!)

Put out the best Nativity set EVER courtesy of my Grammie. My mom has the exact same set, and when I got married, my Grammie searched all over eBay to get me my very own. Mom let Jenna and I put the Nativity set out each year...and Jenna and I may or may not have done some inappropriate things to the baby Jesus. Lord, forgive me.


And I copied my mom's annual Christmas-tree-on-the-ledge idea. A skinny Christmas tree from Hobby Lobby did just the trick:

So, that's how things are getting festive around here. Hope you do get a chance to come by; we'll make some hot cocoa and have a good time.

Jenna's New Love

Jenna has a new love in her life.

And I love her new love, too.

Meet Miley Anderson:


A loving, but ornery little black and white puffball.


Miley was rescued by Jackie. Jackie has a ginormous heart for animals and knew she had to save this little girl who was wandering homeless around the apartment complex where Jackie works. Thank goodness she rescued this little babe...because this little girl is too precious for words!

Jenna and Miley are getting along great...so far Miley has run head first into a mirror, dive bombed into a plate of mustard and even joined Jenna in the shower.


I'd say the two of them were destined to be. And so, I'll leave you with this picture:

HAHAHA! I guess you get the best of both words, huh, Jenna?

3 years and counting...

Two weeks ago Tim and I are celebrated our third wedding anniversary. It doesn't seem like much, especially when both our our parents are celebrating their 30th wedding anniversaries this year. Even still, I can't believe we've been married three years! Where does the time go?

Tim and I have look forward to celebrating our anniversary. It's important because we realize how lucky we are to have found each other and to be in a relationship that means so much.

So, I love when our anniversary rolls around because it means we're going to do something special...even if it is just something simple.

For our first anniversary, we went back to Nazareth Hall where we got married and reenacted all our wedding weekend activities. From having dinner that night at Bar Louie in Perrysburg where our rehearsal dinner was held to staying at the Comfort Suites where we stayed the night of our wedding.


Then, on our actual anniversary, we enjoyed the obligatory wedding tradition of eating our wedding cake, um, I mean cookies and had a nice homemade dinner.



For year two, we went to our new favorite restaurant in Northeast Ohio: the Tomato Grill. We reserve this restaurant for all our special occasions. Then, we came home for chocolate covered strawberries at home.

For year three, we went all the way back to the beginning of our relationship at Ohio Northern University. Nearly seven years ago, Tim and I met there. He was just a boy from Lancaster, NY hoping to make it through pharmacy school. I was just a girl from 50 minutes up the road hoping to make it away from home without being homesick.


Our paths were very different and there were a million ways that we could not have ever met each other, but we did. And it was fun to go back and remember all those moments on campus together.

Of course, top on our list was to visit the famous Founders Hall where we both lived freshman year (but never met) and have both worked as RA's/Head Resident.



We also had to make sure to stop by Tim's freshman dorm room- Founders 252.


We visited the new pharmacy/science building....


Took a trip to the third floor of the library where a lot of special memories were made....like studying.

We also visited Meyer Hall and room 107 where Tim spent the majority of his five years on campus. And look...he still remembers where he sat.


Then we went to my side of campus to check in on my Bernay's Cup which I won for a writing competition.


But then, no trip would be complete to ONU without a walk, something Tim and I did a lot while we were dating. So, we set out on the Green Monster, which was windy, just like I remember it. In fact, ONU has capitalized on their endless wind supply by erecting three windmills.


On our walk, we stopped by the football stadium for a picture of the polar bear and did what most people do when they see it..hop on top of it.


And ultimately our walk ended exactly where most of our walks at ONU ended....at this marble bench by the pond.

Tim and I spent many nights out on the bench, just getting away from the residence halls and catching up. It's a great place to develop a relationship. I hope some ONU boy and girl are still using it today.


After our walk, windswept and all, we went to the pub back at the Inn on campus. I can officially say I had a drink while on campus...in plain view. (I won't confess when or if I drank at other times while on campus, but I can confirm two things if it did occur...I wasn't a student when I did it and I was of age...OK, mom and dad? You don't need to worry.)

We ended the night by going to Padrone's, our favorite pizza place, and a trip to Northern on Main for hot chocolate. It was a perfect trip down memory lane and a great way to celebrate three amazing years. Here's hoping the next three years are just as good!

What's Up

What's up?

This is what's up...on my wall anyway:

My wine rack from the wine tour!! My loving husband surprised me one night by hanging it for me. We bought a stud finder to help us anchor it securely in the wall, but either it was broken or we're just....well, you know...not handy. So, it's just holding two bottles of wine for now, but it looks awesome.

Since we're on the topic of wall hangings...here's what I'd like to do with the wall-of-blank (remember? check it out here):


I'm in the process of picking out all those lovely pictures and then I'll just have to convince Tim we need to go to Pittsburgh's Ikea.

Well, off to unload the dishwasher...and do more laundry. Seriously. The fun never stops around here.

Ok, I'm Listening Now

For the past month, my heart has been heavy and my mind full of worry, doubt, frustration, disappointment and hurt. I have kept these feelings inside, only sharing bits and pieces of my sadness with Tim or through email and phone with family and close friends. But, I've never been full able or willing to share all that I am feeling. It's just too much sometimes.

Yesterday, I had to go to a baby shower for a friend. I was feeling anxious because I didn't want to face my feelings. But as much as I was resistant, God knew I needed to be there. Not only for my friend, but because He has been trying to get my attention for the past month now, and I've done everything I can to ignore it. I've not been listening.

My friend has had infertility troubles of her own and before her shower, she got up and shared her testimony of how important it is to be faithful to God - in good times and bad - and that he knows the desires of your heart. And how important it is to give your pain and joy up to God - for he can carry it better than we can and he always has a plan.

I know that that has been said a lot. "God has a plan." I know this to be true, but I don't walk with this belief. In fact, I've been actually thinking, "Some rotten plan, God. Thanks a bunch." I've been very ungrateful and unappreciative of his plan for me. In my opinion, I think it stinks.

But here's what I've been missing - he does absolutely have a plan for me and I've been spending all this time down here trying to do my own thing and make my own life, when truly, his plan is better than anything I've got in mind. I have had such a hard time giving up control to him and just saying, "OK, you've got this one. Because I don't." And he used my time yesterday at a baby shower, so close to that source of pain, to finally get me to listen and say, "Jess, I'm going to take care of you and I have a perfect plan. Trust me."

I've never been one to say I have experienced a "Godly" moment...like a vision, or encounter with an angel, etc. I'm most often to practical for that. But I have no way to explain what happened when I got in my car after the shower to go home last night. I went to plug in my iPod for the road trip home and it started right up as soon as I plugged it into the aux cable outlet in the car. The song that came on was four songs ahead on my playlist from where I left off when I arrived at the shower...and it happened to be the song "For the Moments I Feel Faint" by Reliant K, a Christian band that Tim introduced me to when we started dating.

Now, if you don't know this song, it means nothing. But the lyrics go something like this:

Am I at the point of no improvement?
What of the death I still dwell in?
I try to excel, but I feel no movement.
Can I be free of this unreleasable sin?

[Chorus:]
Never underestimate my Jesus.
You're telling me that there's no hope.
I'm telling you you're wrong.

Never underestimate my Jesus
When the world around you crumbles
He will be strong, He will be strong

I throw up my hands
"Oh, the impossibilities"
Frustrated and tired
Where do I go from here?
Now I'm searching for the confidence I've lost so willingly
Overcoming these obstacles is overcoming my fear

I think I can't, I think I can't
But I think you can, I think you can
I think I can't, I think I can't
But I think you can, I think you can
Gather my insufficiencies and
place them in your hands, place them in your hands, place them in your hands

I got the message loud and clear. I'm listening now. It's out of my hands and time to give up that control to the one who is always in control...because clearly my path isn't working. I finally get that I need to stop underestimating the power of God and all that he has in mind; he does know what he is doing as much I think that it isn't making any sense. It is so clear to him.

"Jesus looked at them and said, 'With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.'" -Matthew 19:26